Ireland's recession - My late awakening! (Part II)

Only kidding about the book - the story is a freesome; no one in their right mind would dole out cash to buy a book I had written

I was acutely aware for some time that since leaving the seminary in 2003, my hair had begun to recede in rapid fashion. But I brushed it aside, deeming it best to just not look at the back of my head in mirrors too often. At 28, I could have guessed that it would end up like this. If you saw my brothers you'd know what I mean. Of course, there is nothing wrong with been bald. Though it did seem to affect my self-esteem for a while.

2007 - Leaving some hair in an Egyptian pool

But this was the first time I had been aggressively told to cover it up. It was like a Pauline letter to the Corinthians had come to life in order to make me feel ashamed that my head was bare. How dare I! To those with highlights and a good stock of hair on their scalps, it was a mortal sin to expose such an horrific sight.

I laughed it off, but a few days later I fulfilled what I had been meaning to do for a long time - shave my hair off and see if embracing the bare facts would be more visually appealing.

The razor blade in the hands of the Polish hairdresser swiftly wiped the slate clear. '€7 please,' he uttered in broken English. He had only arrived in Dublin 5 days earlier. We spoke in Polish for a while during the rapid process. Polish hairdressers are used to giving crop haircuts. It is part and parcel of the stereotypical Polish male, 16-25 years old, during the summer months. No sideburns, shaved head, shorts, white socks pulled up, dark coloured sneakers, athletic build, tracksuit top, and a studio-tan.

Glancing in the mirror, I knew that no other multi-colour haired teen would ever bother his arse hanging out of a car window again to point out my baldy patch again. He might think he us up against a hefty Pole who would take no prisoners. And after all, my hole head now looked like a baldy patch.

Embracing your weaknesses often disarms your nemesis.

As regards male pattern baldness, or alopecia, Lois Bragg informs us in Oedipus Borealis of the recently married protagonist,
"Grim was then 25 years old, and was that time bald-headed; from then on, he was called Bald-Grim."
She continues,
"Joseph Nagy (1981) has shown that in medieval Ireland baldness is associated either with low rank (slaves, for example) or, in contrast, with liminality (druids, for example, or heroes undergoing intiation, such as Finn Mac Cumhail), and this matches what we find in Homer's presentation of Thersites, who was bald as well as crippled and deformed, and who was treated like a slave yet functioned as high level advisor to Agamemnon."

All fascinating stuff. Then I came across Baldness: A Social History by Kerry Segrave, a fantasic 200 page book covering the history, causes, cures, eccentric explanations, quackery, and social attitudes to the modern industry preventing nature from taking it's course.

July 2008 - Albedo affect

Let me leave you with the opening lines and in the knowledge that I am not as vain as the prophet Elisha.
One of the earlist overreactions by a baldie concerned the prophet Elisha. In the second book of Kings, Chapter 2, it is recorded; " And he went up from thence unto Bethel: and as he was going up by the way, there came forth little children out of the city, and mocked him, and said unto him, Go up, thou bald head, go up, thou bald head; and he turned back, and looked on them, and cursed them in the name of the Lord. And there came forth two she bears out of the wood, and tare forty and two children of them."

After taking the plunge - Skint to the bone


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